Reflections from the Jesuit Center: after discovering the nonexistant gate, a walk back up the hill

On the grounds of the Jesuit Center, Wernersville PA, 2015 by Wayne Stratz

After discovering the gate was not where it was supposed to be, and being told where it was by the passing by Jesuit; I had to walk back up the hill to the Jesuit Center.

Five images have survived the purge of photos taken on that walk up the hill. The first is a celebration of a lush evergreen botanical life.  The second photo shows the ravages of an aging leaf. The summer is early but the great vibrancy of a springtime leafing Maple has moved on to leaves showing the signs of a hard life.

On the grounds of the Jesuit Center, Wernersville PA, 2015 by Wayne Stratz

 Then there was this Maple seed. A sign of hope. One could say, "a dashed hope" as it rests on the macadam driveway at the Jesuit Center, but a tree could still emerge. Who knows where that seed could travel to if forces lifted it up?

On the grounds of the Jesuit Center, Wernersville PA, 2015 by Wayne Stratz

It sure was a wet June this 2015, after a dry springtime. Talks of drought were gone and fungi were sending up their fruiting bodies. And like the Maple leaf, it captures my destination in the background.

On the grounds of the Jesuit Center, Wernersville PA, 2015 by Wayne Stratz

I am no bird photographer and my camera is really, really not up for the job, so when I got home with hundreds of silent photos, this Blue Jay delighted me. I knew it was there. I had hope that it was in the frame. I clicked. Hopefully in the next moment it would be nourished by a leaf eating insect on this Maple tree.

On the grounds of the Jesuit Center, Wernersville PA, 2015 by Wayne Stratz

Notes from the Jesuit Center: Lamps and Becoming Still and Realizing It Was Time to Acknowledege God

lamp at the Jesuit Center in Wernersville by Wayne Stratz

 The first night works like this: arrive before dinner with plenty of time to unpack and set up art studio in my room. When I entered the Jesuit Center, a Jesuit looked at me and said, "The artist is here."

Dinner, you can talk; and in the process I met a female Episcopalian priest from Maryland. 22 meals later I would meet a female Episcopalian priest from New York. Anyway, a meeting with your spiritual director ensues and times for direction are handed out. Most times I take an early in the morning time, but it felt right to take the mid-afternoon time. It proved to be wise as I really liked having my mornings free to be silent.  

lamp at the Jesuit Center in Wernersville by Wayne Stratz

We were given one verse to read, if moved to do so. Psalm 46:10

lamp at the Jesuit Center in Wernersville by Wayne Stratz

But first, all thirty plus of us would gather to begin our retreat together. It is a chance to share a concern with the others. Having read an article on mass extinctions and news reports on the Pope's call for caring for the planet; I put out a prayer for our planet.

lamp at the Jesuit Center in Wernersville by Wayne Stratz

I know Psalm 46:10 ... “Be still, and know that I am God..."

But that night in the silence, as lamps illuminated quiet hallways, my Bible did not read "know."

Instead, the word, acknowledge was there. I thought, "hmmm, that is a bit different from know." My retreat had been set in motion. I sat down and drew Margaret a card.

...

Thoughts on my Psalm 139 reflection

Psalm 139 begins with a description of a God, who is very difficult to escape. Tracking our location, movements, thoughts, and words which we are preparing to speak. This ancient text could compare with those who speak out on the tracking of Facebook, Google, credit card companies, and the NSA.

Is God like the NSA, impossible to escape from so that we will get caught if we do wrong? Is God selling our personal info to maintain pearly gates? Is God an overly obsessed lover, who ignores any restraining order we try to place upon him?

Or maybe God wants to have a conversation with us. Ignatius was big on conversations with God and all of creation. Knowing someone greater by intimate time, leads to greater love. God just may be with us at all times so that we can become more intimate. Through prayer, spiritual direction, jazz, art, and flower gardens; I get to know God and God gets to know me.

But Psalm 139 is meaningful for me for the next line which was not part of the daily reading last Sunday.

Verse 13. You created my inmost self, knit me together in my mother's womb.

My spiritual director suggested I read psalm 139 as I entered into my first 8 day retreat. It was at a time when I was exploring how a youth filled with visits to a urologist had affected my life. For 8 days God and I wrestled with a rather poorly knit urthrethra. Not what I was expecting when I drove to the Jesuit Center, but it was a long over due conversation.

Verse 14. For so many marvels I thank you; a wonder am I, and all your works are wonders. You knew me through and through,

OK, so maybe God gave me a poorly knit urinary tract, but I got to be awed by the hands he gave me. On the 4th of July, I sent out this image asking my Facebook friends to be careful while handling fireworks.

15. my being held no secrets from you, when I was being formed in secret, textured in the depths of the earth.

God wants us to share our secrets. I told no one about those doctor visits, which began when I was four, until I was in college. God was there when I finally told my story and has been encouraging me ever since. We are called into a life of intimate relationships fueled by conversations. God would rather not miss one.

 

 

Willow Weep For Me (b) ~> Renée Yoxon sings

Eventually I emerged from the tree, but I continued to spend time with the tune as my silent retreat unfolded. Turned out I had several versions on my iPod but only one with vocals. I was not disappointed.

Renée Yoxon sings it beautifully. LISTEN HERE

Willow weep for me

Bend your branches down along the ground

and cover me

 

In Awe ~ Stained Glass and Sunrises at the Jesuit Center

When I said I wanted to continue to experience awe in my studio as I prayed in August and ever since, this is what I meant: please God, let the beauty of your light streaming through glass always amaze me. And, God never let me lose the amazement that friends and folk I have never met have trust in me to create unseen pieces of art for them.

I placed this piece in my room on the evening I entered silence in August. The plan was to give it to my spiritual director. But plans change if you allow them. The glass did not want to be in my room, so I moved it out to where folk wait to see their spiritual director. It faces east. It dug the sunrise.

Then an idea came to mind and I created a rather large and complex doodle for my spiritual director. On my last day, I handed the stained glass to a Jesuit and suggested a place it could hang. Today I got a post card from the Jesuit. They have decided otherwise, it will hang on the first floor, facing west. He invited me to come see it. That will happen. I dig sunsets too.

 

Looking up at the Jesuit Center, seeing hawks

Hawk on UCC steeple Wernersville, PA
by Wayne Stratz

 One night in the midst of silence, I noticed a hawk on the highest point of the Jesuit Center. I wondered when crows would chase it away. I walked about. An hour or more later it was still there, which delighted me but also made me wonder if it was real, so I ventured closer till I saw its head turn. I guess it was enjoying the view.

The next evening I ventured out and happened to look up at the UCC church adjacent to the Jesuit Center. And there was a hawk at the highest point.

Hawk on UCC steeple Wernersville, PA
by Wayne Stratz

At no point in time did I see a hawk when I looked up at these two perches in the following days. But looking up is a good habit. There is much to be seen other than hawks.

Hawk on UCC steeple Wernersville, PA
by Wayne Stratz

Emerging From a Comfortable Silence

I drove up to sunflowers that dazzled me Monday at noon. The eight days of silence had gone as smoothe as any retreat I had been on, it felt comfortable from beginning to end. Well, except my spiritual director kept asking me how I felt about this, that, and the other thing. But that's her job, too take me deeper into my experience.

I fully expected to come home and storm social media with a last days drive to meet my campaign to feed the hungry. And it started that way, but it just didn't feel right. And the hours are ticking by to midnight in California turns the campaign to a pumpkin on August 31.

I want to write reflections, not flood the Internet with requests for help.

Nearly 30 years ago I was walking door to door trying to spread the good message of the environment. I was OK with getting folk to listen to me, but terrible at raising money. Thus I did not get paid to do it for very long. I am pleased to having raised over $1000.00. But I am tired of asking for money.

I have made Manna on Main known to my friends. I have passed along some information about hunger. But I feel more compelled to be in my studio, in my garden, and with friends then doing a final flurry. 

I once rode my bicycle to the Catskills. I would pull into campgrounds much to the amazement of those, who had arrived in trucks pulling campers. What I remember most from the trip is the desire those new neighbors had to feed me. I was far from starving, but I was much better fed when I moved on the next morning. I did not know where I would stop, but it always turned out that I was invited to a meal.

Now I am curious how that kindness might have led to a lifetime of supporting people who feed the hungry, and to the pleasure I have inviting folk over for dinner. As I write this, I am hoping to draw more cards of thanks for those who support my goal of 21 hundred dollars. But I am ready to be content passing on these final thoughts. 

Feed the hungry.

Donate to your local food pantry.

Volunteer, they need hands as well as money.

Put a huge basket for canned goods in your church or office.

Feed the hungry.

The journey ends where it began.

10 best things about the Jesuit Center in Wernersville

1. The Amish Room

as a Pennsylvanian German raised Lutheran, there is something very welcoming of being able to eat a pretzel anytime I want one.

2. The Grounds

as one who loves to roam, there is plenty of space to do that. But I have to admit that my favorite place to roam is into the UCC cemetery where I always have a good chance to see a bluebird.

3. Books

The library not only has the full set of the Oxford English Dictionary, but is also where I found the complete stories of Flannery O'Connor. The bookstore is well stocked and a fine place to visit. The only thing that stops me from buying books is knowing I own so many I have not read.

4. The Postage Stamp Messiah 

5. Stained Glass

The sanctuary has amazing glass and then there is the pleasant surprise of seeing my own piece on the third floor. A reminder of all the creative moments I have had at the Jesuit Center

6. The Wernersville Tree

7. The pool

I don't really dig swimming, but the last place I swam was there.

8. The Pool Table

I really do dig pool tables and rarely have a chance to play.  I have even had silent games when a fellow lover of the sport arrived upon the scene.

9. The Feminine Images of God Retreat

Sister Maria has developed this silent retreat that led me to know Sophia. How many pieces of art have I created with 21 pieces because of that week long retreat getting to know Lady Wisdom and her 21 attributes.

10. The Hildreth Meiere Mosaic

A reminder of how art can transform a life. It was seeing this mosaic that sparked the desire inside of Margaret to become a mosaic artist. 

The Sunflower Commission is about to unfold

A few weeks ago I put out a cry for help. I was packing for a time at the Jesuit Center. It wasn't the choice of clothes or mug (that is for Michelle) that was causing me angst. It was the intensity of the commissions, which I was hoping to design.

The client, who hoped to bring peace to grieving parents, came by for the mandala he commissioned. The blue behind the symbol of the lost child caught his eye. May it truly bring peace.

Margaret has grouted the Celtic Tree wedding present. I think we did something amazing together and may it be a blessing to the two lives that will unfold together.

And now the sunflower. I first tried to hand the commission to Margaret, who has made mandalas inspired by the colors of various sunflowers. But as you can see the client wrote, "made by your hand," and then went on to share her connections. I took that note with me and read it prior to designing the suncather with the hope that I could capture what clearly is her totem plant.

The post card was sent to the Jesuit Center by Michelle. It came late, but it showed up here in Lansdale. Jesuits are kind that way (I owe the man a thank you). Michelle's card is in my studio as a reminder of all those who prayed for me.

My client also digs Jesuits and she believes our lives unfold like a sunflower. This is no typical sunflower. It is like us. Beautiful, but only emerging into our full splendor.

Three commissions that awed me. That took me to the hope that I could create them in the midst of prayer.

 

Loyola Press celebrating Jesuit inspired art

I am still pondering a question my spiritual director asked me while I was at the Jesuit Center. That post is coming. My Forgiveness mandala is a piece I designed while on retreat. We had a large wooden base hanging about our studio, I drew a circle, grabbed pencils and a mighty erasure and headed off into silence.

I am sure you have assumed that many an artist are inspired by their faith and by Ignatian spirituality. Well, Loyola Press is highlighting some great people. Check it out.

And how kind of my friend Michelle to speak of my art when she spread the word of what Loyola Press is up to.

 

Posted with Blogsy

Wisdom of Hafiz and in glass

I am thinking about how art emerges while I am on retreats, as I work on a piece designed at the Jesuit Center months ago. This past weekend I entered silence and left with five designs for commissions. While there I read some poems by Hafiz over and over. This one spoke to me as I tried to be still ~

Just

sit there right now.

Don't do a thing. Just rest.

For your

separation from God

is the hardest work in this world.

Let me bring you trays of food and something

that you like to

drink.

You can use my soft words

as a cushion

for your

head.

Posted with Blogsy